Keeping up with the Jozi
Like any self-respecting Capetonian, I am terrified of Joburg. Absolutely petrified. We can’t stay there without being plagued by paranoia of getting mugged or mutilated, and that’s just in the OR...
View ArticleHow do you like them nipples?
Nipples. Not just a word to get your attention but also something we all have two of. I saw real-life lady nipples for the first time when I was 12 years old and those nipples belonged to Kate Winslet....
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Gone in 41 seconds
Us menfolk are pretty generous with statistics when they are our own: ladies wooed, stitches acquired, size of fish caught, bones broken, number of hours spent locked out of your house while naked...
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Show and towel
Most people go out and buy towels when they need them. I don’t. I win towels. I am a towelwinner. It wasn’t always like this. For a while now I had been meaning to buy a new towel, as I well overdue...
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WHERE THERE’S A WOLF, THERE’S A WAY
One of the perks of China taking over the world is the increase in low-cost novelty hats. Recently, while looking for birthday present in a Chinese shop for someone who doesn’t mind getting presents of...
View ArticleMission Impi-ossible
Impi. It’s not just a Johnny Clegg song anymore, it’s test of toughness that involves indemnity forms – putting it on par with GI missions in Vietnam and Kamp Staaldraad. Our Ed drew straws and...
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Friend Zone Without Benefits
Is it possible to be Friend Zoned by an inanimate object? Probably not, but read this anyway. The Urban Dictionary defines the Friend Zone as: A state of being where a male inadvertently becomes a...
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A Vicious Cycle
I grew up on farm, which means I have an innate hatred of cyclists. Ever since cycling became the new golf, my long-suffering father has endured cyclists trespassing through his fields and cutting his...
View ArticleSWAZAMBIQUE
A short video of two countries, two weeks, two second hand bikes and two friends who didn’t kill each other despite being in each others’ company on the road for 650 kilometres. (Watch it in high...
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END ZONE OF THE FRIENDZONE!
After a year of being friendzoned by a half-marathon silver medal, it took 88 minutes of heavy plodding to finally reach heavy petting on the futon of athletic accomplishment. Like any good...
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AUTOMATIC FOR THE PEOPLE
I’ve never had to worry about being humble; my car did that for me for seven years. I’ve recently upgraded from said car to one that has five gears. And let me tell you, dear reader, that extra gear is...
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HOPE-LESS/FUL WANDERER
I met two full-time pedestrians in two consecutive days on the road. The first one I encountered outside Barrydale as my host was driving me from his farm into town. We saw him walking towards the...
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